How to creep a girl out on your first sentence

“You remind me of someone I once knew when I was very young, a girl in my neighborhood. Every summer I’d see her down at the pool. We’d swim and talk and play. We were only 10 or so. She had a crush on me, so they said, and I totally did of her, too. But again, we were only 10. Nothing made me happier than to go swim in the pool all day long there, thinking of her if she wasn’t there or with her if she was. Then one day one summer she didn’t appear. I had no idea where she went. I never saw or heard from her again. It made me wish I had kissed her, or told her somehow. It made me appreciate the power and potential of a moment.

Now, I’m sure you’re not her, but you brought this memory back to me. Thank you for it. It’s a very happy one, which has instilled a great drive in me in the world. Do you ever sometimes get jarred by random but powerful nostalgia?

On a way lighter note, how’d you find me, and what did you think of my page? Yours was very interesting. But a torture porn mention in the first paragraph? That’s some intense stuff. I hope you haven’t had to encounter too many of these situations! Ha.

As for the rest, there was so much interesting. I’m a huge fan of the summer, ocean, and iced coffee too. But it usually would be light and sweet iced coffee, or mixed with some chocolate milk! Mmm. How do you enjoy?

I also find myself daily thinking how to be a happier, calmer, and better person — though, I’m pretty calm in the first place. I also find myself thinking most hours how can I be expediting my ambitions, and becoming the world leader I want to be. Although you haven’t figured out what you’re saving for, would you like to travel? Don’t you think there are great potentials within us all, that we must tap and see flourish?

Then with all those thoughts, I likewise find myself watching Daily Swim all the time — and up far too late, especially now with this Daylight Saving’s missed hour. I’m not a big fan of the lost hour of sleep last night. I need some time to get over the absence, I think. Ha. Maybe in a week. Do you like Robot Chicken? ATHF? ‘Cuz we are the aqua teens, make the homies say ho! and the girlies wanna scream! Aqua Teen Hunger Force, number one in the hood, G! LOL. Oh man, we’d have a fun time watchin’ that or chilln’ together, I think, if you dig that style of humor..

Ok, that is way longer a note than I had originally planned on writing you. Sorry ‘bout the rambling. Ha. I know I haven’t even answered 100 of these crazy OKC match questions which it says your mailbox prefers. Hopefully you can forgive the few point difference between the 80% it also says the mailbox prefers. Ha. I don’t put much stock in those questions, to be honest. Most are so totally outlandish!

Well, enjoy your night there. Write back! Look forward to hearing from you. Night.

Drivin’ in my car, livin’ like a star,
Josh”

- Thanks to Alice from OKcupid for her submission.  She says this was after she looked at this guys page that he randomly sent her this email.
Dear god, does that guy like his Aqua Teen Hunger Force, or ATHF as he called it. Also I recommend never saying “enjoy your night there” and “how do you enjoy?” that just screams “I’m socially awkward and you might end up in a body bag.” Our pal Josh might have some issues with the ladies, probably due to his large collection of anime and cartoon network shirts.  To put it in a language nerds can understand: wearing that shit is like strapping kryptonite to yourself and wanting to hang with Superman. Not gonna happen.